Searching for Meaning and Purpose...

You know, worship is a word that has been abused. When we say worship, most people instantly think of a church service. But, worship is so much more than one hour out of our week! Worship is giving worth to something or to put it in better words, it's where we place the utmost value. What we worship is always easily traceable. All it takes is following the trail of three things: time, money, and passion. Where we spend our money, spend out time, and invest our passion is what we worship. Period. A lot of times I find myself worshiping my ministry. I spend so much time, money, and passion pouring myself into my ministry to teenagers for God that I neglect the God that I am doing everything for. I push out the appropriate object of my worship for one of my own devising. And yes, that is SO not the way it should be. And I'm a youth pastor! If I'm supposed to lead students to a deeper understanding of and a real relationship with God, how can I do that when mine is

Snow is a great thing, sometimes (at least once in a while!). It is so... white. It makes things look so new and clean. A fresh blanket of white covering up all the spots that are a mess. It's a great thing. It's invigorating. It refreshes. But, it eventually melts away. The sad part about the first snow of the year is that it melts. I always hated snow when I had to work in it, but now that I'm not required to be out in it all day, I find it quite nice. Although the melting part is what has caught my view today. As the snow melts away, all the things it hid come back. The spots where things were dead or where they shouldn't be (like the animal poo in the flower beds...) come back. I hate that. The whole image put me in mind of my own soul. Snow may temporarily cover the spots, but they come back. My problem is more that I add spots to my soul when it's clean and then they turn back into the old ones that were covered. It's rather irritating. Ju

Yesterday was great (especially the food: turkey, potatoes, sweet potatoes, pumpkin pie, mmmm ...) but why does getting up super early and running out to some store sound good to people? Especially when it's cold... Although, enough people do it that it makes for quite an experience I'm told (I have never and likely will never go shopping on post Thanksgiving day, unless I have the money to blow on some really cool electronics, in which case I will be at Best Buy early). But, here's my question: why does Thanksgiving lead to shopping? Who decided that being thankful for God's provision meant being willing to spend a lot of money? I really don't think it's very cool. Thanks should turn into service and ministry, not consumer debt. I understand that a lot of the shopping people do is for Christmas, but that only serves to irk me further. Why do we feel the need to buy TONS of stuff no one really needs to celebrate Christ? It makes no sense! God calls us t

It's amazing how much fun (or not ) family can be. Simply by being around family, we can have lots of fun or get extremely stressed and angry. It's quite interesting to see the extremes in emotion our family members can inspire. I suppose it all goes to the fact that they know us best; all the good, bad, and ugly. It also reminds me of the way we are intended to be in the church: family. We are supposed to know the other people in our church the same way we do family. This might sound extremely scary to some, but to me it seems like the best thing possible. Why, you're probably asking? Because in sharing all of our lives we get to experience the utmost richness that can come from being known. There is just something innately human that desires to be known by someone. Even if it's only one person, we have the desire to be known for who we really are not who people think we are or who we're supposed to be. This desire is so tapped in church the way it's

You know, I'm constantly amazed at God's grace. I'm still reading Titus, but today is so much more encouraging than yesterday. I mean, seriously, reading lists of who I should be (and know I'm not really that person!) versus being reminded of the fact that God's love and grace have absolutely nothing to do with me. It's an awesome realization. Yeah, I know God's grace is a "free gift" and I can spout off platitudes until I'm blue in the face (part of being a pastor type person). But, until I hear the voice of God whispering in my ear as I read His word, it's not real yet. In fact, until I hit today, my reading had sent me into a bit of a funk simply because I had heard God speak and it was some of the same things I was thinking: I need to follow, simply and honestly; I need to obey, simply because He loves me; I need to listen more, simply because I'm so loud; I need to love Him more, simply because I know how much He loves me.

I've been reading Titus and it kind of scares me. Looking at things I "should" do and things I "ought" to model and be, versus who I am so often is a frightening thing. For some odd reason, I still think of Paul or Peter as these perfect kind of guys who did all this without issue. But... We see Peter screw up constantly (besides, who else can go from blessed by God because of His divine revelation to "get thee behind me, S atan " in two breaths?) in the gospels. Paul, however, wrote all this stuff but didn't get a portion of his life recorded. Which puts things in a bit of perspective: I try, Paul tried. Paul wrote, I speak. Paul's life wasn't written down for me to see his struggles, screw-ups, hang-ups, and issues. My life is an open book for me to evaluate and realize how screwed up I am. Perhaps here's my biggest issue: I am a pastor, I'm "supposed" to be perfect. I'm not supposed to deal with issues lik

You know, being supported is a great feeling. Knowing that despite our failures, foibles, and general stupidity we're still loved and supported is a fantabulous thing. Jesus is there, but that is so nebulous it's hard to hang onto. Seeing someone else support and love you, that is life changing. The idea is to be Jesus to someone else. I think I have been, but have I really been supportive? Back in the Old Testament, we see an awesome story of support (Exodus 17.8-ff) The Israeli's were wandering through the wilderness when the Amalakites attacked. When ever Moses had his arms up, the Israeli's were winning. When Moses' arms got tired, they began to lose. This was a mammoth pitched battle, with tons of people running around bashing, smashing, and trying to beat each other to sweaty, bloody pulps of man meat. The thought of losing for the Israelites was unthinkable: they were God's own people, how could they lose? Yet at the same time, if they weren&

Why is it that a GREAT day can be ruined by one thing? Or one person? Why is it possible to see 23 people have an awesome day and have 1 person ruin it in just a couple of moments? That's the question I ask myself this evening. After a fabulous day from 7:00am-3:48pm helping out with Operation Christmas Child, eating pizza at CiCi's , and running around All Star Sports, comes the moment. One action of one person decides the way the whole day is viewed. I hate it! More specifically, I hate the fact that one person can make three hours worth of work (and not the fun kind!) from one action. Not that the work is the issue, it's the kind of work. Nothing more fun than sitting down with parents and letting them know what happened to their little baby and what their little baby did. At least that part of the evening went well, the rest was "fun." Phone calls and questions, face to face talks and questions, more phone calls and questions, never once the answer

When was the last time you had a good laugh? I think God is constantly laughing. I mean, I tell Him my plans and He laughs. Long and hard. Then He tells me in a not so subtle manner, that I'm not in charge! I guarantee that if I was God, I would have unending amounts of laughter in heaven simply because of the things we say and think here on earth. Like not having another kid for a while. I said that and no sooner had it come out of my mouth than God decided I really needed to enjoy child number 4. But, speaking of God, someone recently told me that He was "an unrelenting task master, I mean just look at what He was constantly making people do in the Old Testament." I laughed, hard (kind of like when I saw an Intrust Bank sign while it was being constructed: there was the sign saying "Yes, you can bank here." with a large arrow, pointing directly at the port-o-potty. I laughed so hard I almost drove off the road, in fact I had to pull off and stop I was

As a father looking at this clip, I am so afraid for my little girl. As she grows up she is being thrust into a world that demands she fit certain criteria. In fact, right now girls as young as 8 are beginning diet plans and moving into the scary world of eating disorders. Why? Simple, they want to look like the girl on the cover of the magazine and billboard, the girl on the web who is "perfect." But, as this clip so eloquently illustrates it is not attainable beauty. Instead, our girls are being held up to a mirror that displays an airbrushed, computer adjusted beauty. Before, girls were just trying to look like Barbie. Now they have to look BETTER than Barbie. It's an impossible standard! Not only that, but the majority of teenage girls are being taught (and are thinking!) that their number one reason for being is to be "sexy." This is a downward spiral that will not stop until we adjust the standards they see! Fortunately, Jesus says we are made t

As I started working today I read a few things and then stopped to ask myself a question: when was the last time I stopped and thought about what I'm doing? I had to think a lot to figure out when that was. I evaluate myself regularly on how I'm doing, why I'm doing what I'm doing, and how effective what I'm doing is. But, I never really stop to think about what I'm actually doing. Is it about God and my students or about ministry? Is there really a necessity for lock-ins, concerts, outings, programs, events, and the planning insanity that follows each? So today I'm taking a step back to look at the real reasons for why we do what we do in our ministry. Not only that, I'm looking at why I do what I do each day. Is it an intentional moment for growth or is it simply something to do because we need to do something? Is the message something I feel they need to hear or is it there because we always have a message? These are the questions that I'